Tag Archives: fair

Here We Go Again

lilywhite

The past few month has seen a lot of talk about racism in the media. Particularly in relation to the Oscars. With it, a lot of eye rolling and people saying they are fed up of black people going on about discrimination and playing the race card. What about the Muslims, the gays, the transgender, the browns, the women, the poor? It is a constant source of irritation and sadness for me when these discussions kick off and people start shouting at each other. My first issue is no one wants to listen. This is why racism and the many other forms of discrimination continue to thrive in our societies. Societies that are ashamed to admit a lack of progress and would rather hide what they consider dirty laundry out of view. As if out of sight is really out of mind. Well, it is humanity’s shame and face it we must. Because if we don’t face it then we won’t ever fix it.

On the Oscar issue: yes, it is inherently racist. Why? Because up until recently, majority (94% according to many internet sources) of those who are eligible to nominate and vote for the winners are white and ¾ of those are men. Human nature, and this is evidence-based, is such that if a selection of talented actors/actresses/directors is presented to a person, the voter will look for common traits to identify with the nominees. The easiest trait to identify: skin colour, gender and other physical attributes. So stands to reason that if 94% are white, they are more likely to nominate and vote for white people. There was a blog by a young black woman who works in the entertainment industry published on mumsnet. The reaction was one that had my gnashing my teeth. Many (white, brown and black) suggested that it was not the correct forum for such a discussion. I was dismayed. If mothers are not the people who need to be educated about the ills of discrimination and who need to be encouraged to socialise their children into seeing beyond colour, then who exactly is going to be the catalyst for change?

mother and child

I cannot for the life of me see which other group yields more influence when it comes to such a fundamental change. As a soon to be mother, I see it as absolutely my job to teach my child to see the inner qualities of every person they interact with and judge them based on their actions and words and not the things over which they have no control over.

queue jump

In Nigeria, there is blatant racism still. The fairer your skin is, the more socially desirable you are in many circles. The more foreign your English accent, the more educated you are perceived to be. Being resident in Europe or America or Asia elevates your self-worth. Doesn’t matter if you do the most menial of jobs abroad or have very little education over there. I was born in Nigeria, left as a teenager and I have now officially spent more of my life outside of Nigeria then in it. I see the discrimination clearly. Sure I am a highly educated and successful professional but most of the strangers I interact with don’t know this. To many it is all superficial. I get asked my opinion on things that are well outside my area of expertise and even when I am confessing to having little knowledge, my opinion carries weight. I get better customer service because of the way I speak. I get less abuse from those who like to abuse their positions of power – the police, road safety, customs and immigration officers. When I go into shops run by foreigners, I watch how they treat ordinary Nigerians with barely disguised rudeness or contempt and how those Nigerians do not complain about it. I speak up sometimes to the surprise of those Nigerians and I get told I am ‘feisty or fiery or outspoken’ with amusement or admiration depending on the age of the Nigerian I am defending. I have been in situations where a non-black person has walked into the place, seen the queue of Nigerians waiting to be served and decided that their time was more valuable that the locals and cut to the front. I wait to see if the officials say anything, rarely will they ask for the person to do the right thing. If nothing is said, I am never afraid to tell the person that there is a queue and we were all in it.

The other manifestation is through skin bleaching. It is so prevalent in Nigeria and indeed many other societies. People, mostly women, spend a lot of money on creams and lotions containing dangerous toxins which ‘whiten’ their skin. Some of the more expensive products do a good job and give them fairer skin that looks natural and healthy. Most do not. It is so ugly to see the patchwork that results from some of these products. You see women prancing around with their face and neck a Caucasian skin tone, their arms brown and their joints black as nature intended. It is so unnatural that it sometimes looks like a comedic caricature. Sadly, for those who do it, they look in the mirror and think they look more beautiful. Heart breaking to me because some of the most superficially beautiful people on the planet are all shades of brown and black. There is nothing more beautiful to me than flawless golden or deeper brown skin. I see photos every day and wonder how those who bleach are unable to see the beauty in brown skin. Of course this is all about superficial beauty. Maybe that is where we fail. We are too preoccupied by the outer image and fail to see the beauty within. I truly believe that for a person to be truly beautiful, their soul, their heart and their mind must have a positive nature. That is why I find beauty in the eyes – a person whose eyes glow with love, happiness, kindness and warmth is a person I naturally gravitate towards.  That is why there is nothing more beautiful to me than a baby (human or other mammals). That luminosity that is unspoilt by life and its many hardships, that bright light.

name spelling

Here in England, racism is everywhere. I have a surname that has 3 syllables. Pronounced exactly as it is written yet many won’t even attempt to pronounce my surname. If I can get my head around Siobhan actually being pronounced as shee-von and Yvonne pronounced as Ee-von, then I do not see how it can be hard to say a name as easy as Ab-dal-lah or Jo-da or Di-ya. Working as a doctor on the wards, I have had patients say to me with surprise ‘you speak good English’ and I turn around and say to them ‘why wouldn’t I? English is one of 3 languages I was brought up speaking’. I overhear staff talking to non-native English speakers (those with foreign accents or limited English) very loudly, as if the issue is with hearing loss. I hear comments about those non-indigenous Brits being ungrateful for asking for what is routinely offered to their white British fellow patients. I see the relief in black and Asian patients when I say that I will be their doctor and I will look after them. I empathise with them even as I feel sad that I make them feel better not because of my medical skills but because of the colour of my skin and how they perceive that I can relate to them better or will treat them with more dignity.

I will never forget the first time I was racially discriminated against. I was in my 3rd year of medical school on my first hospital placement in an inner city English hospital working with a medical team. On the first on-call I did with them (on-call means being responsible for the new patients coming in off the streets as emergencies), I was seeing patients who were then reviewed by the qualified doctors. Of course, there is a triage system so medical students never saw patients who needed urgent care for things like an on-going  stroke, heart attack or acute asthma that needed immediate treatment before information gathering. Anyway, I was allocated an elderly Asian gentleman to see. I walked into the cubicle and introduced myself, clearly explaining that I would see the patient then get one of the doctors on my team to review. The patient did not protest but his 2 sons were affronted. They, in their high-powered suits, did not think it was appropriate for their father to be seen by me. They wanted someone else. I got my registrar and told him what they had said. He, being Asian like them, was angrier than I was. He marched me back to the patient and his family, informed them that I was part of the team and as this was the NHS, they would be seen by the first available medic. Their choice was me or going private. How awkward for me and the patient! They apologised and I got through the consultation. This happened 10 years ago and happens to this day. I applaud my registrar for his stance and anecdotally, it is happening less and less because people like that registrar were calling people out for their attitudes.

random search

I spoke in another post about the attitude the police have when they stop you as a black person. The approach is usually quite different – the black person is more likely to be treated as guilty of some wrong-doing until proven otherwise even where you are the victim reporting a crime whereas the white person is more likely to be treated as innocent until proven otherwise. Same as when you go into a shop, a security man (or woman) is more likely to follow around a non-white person than a white person. Same as ‘random’ extra security stop searches in the airports. Once, I got stopped for a random search twice in 10 minutes in Birmingham International Airport less than 100m apart. I was irritated and the lady was apologetic and wouldn’t meet my eyes. I pointed out to her that her colleague had just stopped me randomly too and in fact he was only a stone’s throw away. What was it she thought would have changed in the distance to her? It is a random search ma’am. Randomly because I am black you mean. She flushed and muttered an apology as I gathered my bags and carried on. Random. Racial profiling is reality.

So whilst I know that majority of white people are not actively racist, just as I know that majority of Muslims are not extremists, it is clear that as a black woman, I have more obstacles to contend with. Life is just that little bit harder because I was born with the colour of my skin. I ask for no special treatment. I just want to be treated the same as my non-black friends are. I want to be treated with respect and given my dues. I want people to judge me for what I have said and done (which I have control over) and not the genetics I have inherited. I want my talents to be recognised for what they are and not the physical package they come with. I want the same rights afforded to me by virtue of being a human being. I want justice. I want acceptance. I want to freedom to be me.

Mind the Gap

I watched a BBC documentary on The Taj Mahal Palace, one of the best hotels in the world located in Mumbai according to the documentary. It certainly looked the part. The opulence and the service was certainly worth the thousands a stay would set you back by. This struck me but what struck me more was the homeless families who made their home outside the walls of the hotel. The poor women who sold recycled flowers to make enough to feed their children. Where were the men who fathered those children I wondered? If the Taj was so successful, couldn’t it be charitable enough to feed its resident poor? How could the guests stand to walk (or more likely drive) in past those poor wretches into such luxury?

This sort of wealth inequity is replicated all over the world of course. The less industrialised the nation, the more likely you are to see scenes like these replicated. In Yola where I come from, this is very much in evidence. It is not unusual to see a huge mansion complete with high surrounding walls, an impressive iron gate manned by gatemen and perfectly manicured hedges sitting next to a hut, little more than a lean-to with dry barren land surrounding it and the inhabitant(s) unable to afford 3 square meals and clean drinking water.

When I was little, we would have bouts of feeling charitable and go visit one of those poor homes. Most of them are inhabited by single old women. Some were called witches because of their social isolation or maybe because of their disdain for some of our archaic cultural norms. Many are just poor and alone, without a benefactor to lift them out of abject poverty. A good proportion were quite old and really did need a hand. My friend and I would go in and give their hut a spring clean, refill their water pots (their lounde) and clear out accumulated rubbish. We would leave with their prayers for us and our mothers ringing in our ears. These women managed because they had neighbours like us who would go in periodically and help out.

That is one thing I love about Yola. By Yola I mean Yola town. Not the metropolis that is Jimeta which has lost most of its old school community (or maybe being ‘new’ never got a chance to form the same bonds). No one can deny that poverty is pervasive in the society there but actually, so is charity. It is imbedded in our culture to look after our neighbours. No one in Yola that I know of has ever died of starvation (malnourishment is a different kettle of fish). If your neighbour struggles to find a meal, they could simply turn up at meal times and they would get fed.

I remember one of our dear matriarchs who had little herself always fed more than just herself and her dependents. We always had food to eat at hers even though she was poor herself. When we went to see her before we went off to boarding school, she would ask for forgiveness (in case she died before we came back) and forgive us any infractions then she would rummage under her mat and give us some of her precious savings so we could buy something. We would demure unfailingly but we also knew we had to take it. Because not to take it would be seen as disrespectful and a sign we did not value her loving gesture.

This was 2 decades ago. Things are changing but charity is still very much alive. I am not sure whether the local children are still doing what we did back then but I sincerely hope so. Especially because as religion and politics become more and more of an issue and many of those in our communities claim to be religious. Well then. If that is true, true poverty should never be an issue. Islamically, Zakat is part of our core duties, one of the 5 pillars of Islam.

“Be steadfast in prayer and regular in charity: And whatever good ye send forth for your souls before you, ye shall find it with Allah”                                        Qur’an Chapter 2 Verse 110

For any Muslim who can afford to support their living themselves and have something left over, they should donate 2.5% of their wealth to those who are in need. This is Zakat. Imagine if in a society like Nigeria where an estimated 50% of the population (87 million) are Muslims. Now imagine that about half of them can afford to pay Zakat. If even half of those (20 million) contributed 2.5% of their wealth to a community fund that was well-managed, things would be so different. So I challenge the practising Muslims who preach all things good to sit up and remember this core duty of ours. More than a billion Muslims across the globe, a good proportion with enough wealth to alleviate poverty all around them. Let’s do it people!

Champion the Truth

If you don’t live in the UK, you may have missed the junior doctor contract row that has been brewing for a few years but has escalated over the last couple of months. If you live in the UK and rely on major media outlets to keep you informed, you may think the dispute is about junior doctors asking for more money. I would suggest you turn to social media for more accurate information from doctors, other NHS staff and more importantly their families. Long and short of it is that the dispute is about our Government deciding we junior doctors need to work longer hours whilst our pay is cut and refusing to do the simple arithmetic that would show that if you want more junior doctors working around the clock, you need to recruit more of them because we are already working long hours and we absolutely will not do me as it would put our lives and the lives of patients that we hold so importantly at risk. I mean, how is it fair that the Government has voted to pay its MPs more and they can still claim vast amounts on expenses yet the very same Government says we have no money in the coffers to pay for more junior doctors? Isn’t that ridiculous???

I digress, please read up on Facebook, twitter and blogs writing on the issue. Plenty of truth out there is you care. The baseline is that at least half of the junior doctors who have voiced their opinions have stated either that they have made up their minds to quit the NHS or are at the very least, looking into alternate careers or going abroad. The simple truth is we as a group of junior doctors think the bottom line is that the Tories have vested interest to tear down the NHS and privatise our healthcare and hence line their pockets. There is also strong evidence out there that the current fool we call our Health Secretary has been a champion of NHS privatisation for many years and probably owns share in private health insurance conglomerates like Virgin Health.

This blog is actually about the one good thing that has come from this attack on junior doctors. We now have an online Facebook forum called Junior Doctors Forum which is by invitation only. It has 63,000 members and counting. Not all of them are junior doctors. We have consultants, medical students, nurses, midwives, paramedics and other allied healthcare professionals plus a few lawyers, journalists and even politicians about the forum. What I want to do is big up the passion of those on the forum and champion them sticking to their guns and being honest about how they feel and what this is doing to us as a group. Never has there been so much unity within the profession. Medicine is a very hierarchical and competitive profession and although we all start as one, we generally sub-divide as we become more senior and choose specialisation programmes. Our world then shrinks even further so all we know is related to the one field eventually. Our only contact with the outside specialities is if they are part of the multi-disciplinary team that we need to make sure each patient’s care is optimal with the inclusion of all relevant expertise.

So it is all good news though? No. Unfortunately when you get 63,000 opinionated voices with the top 1% in terms of IQ and ability to rationalise, debate and analyse, you get varying opinions. I am all for freedom of speech and embracing our differences. However, as with all other aspects of life, some are excessively worried about how other people interpret our opinions. An article was published based around a discussion we had on the forum and people are getting all uppity about all coming across professional and un-emotional. Why? If this was about professionalism only, we would all continue our stony silence whilst we get attacked as we give our all for the greater good. This time, we have stood up and shouted NO because not only have they attacked us (we have thick skin because of the nature of being medics who take enormous responsibilities day in, day out) but they are threatening the very fabric of the health of our nation. Their proposals are not only ensuring that many of us want to leave because we choose life and living than putting ourselves in danger from physical and mental exhaustion, they are also meaning that we are now less willing to carry on doing extra unpaid hours for no thanks.

The NHS has been running on the goodwill of its junior doctors for a very long time and things have been in a steady decline for the past decade yet this is the first year that doctors have threatened to strike. We love the NHS and have been carrying its weight to the detriment of our mental, physical and psychosocial health for far too long. This is the straw that will break the camel’s veritable back. It is because we are passionate that we are fighting the proposed changes which may start with junior doctors but we all know will extend to the rest of the hardworking staff the NHS is lucky to have as its employees. How then can anyone ask that we lie about how angry and betrayed we feel? How upset we are that we are being made to reconsider our futures? Whether we can afford to have children and continue to be there for our patients? How the lies of Hunt et al are demoralising us? How we don’t feel it is worth it anymore to carry on in the NHS when all we get for breaking our backs for a pittance (£11/hr 6 years after graduating for me compared to a plumber who can earn up to £50/hr) is abuse and an Etonian ignoramus vilifying us for caring.

Well, I am here to say that no. I will not be unemotional. If I didn’t care for the NHS, I would have quit after my first foundation year when I became a fully licenced medical practitioner. If all I care for was the money, I would be abroad today with a private clinic, dictating my hours and pay. If I didn’t care, I would not be attending protests and spending what little I have left over after my living expenses and medicolegal expenses on supportive merchandise. I care and I am not afraid to show it.

Hunt is only the face of the Tory campaign to break the NHS and leave privatisation as its only viable option. The Tory Government is libellous, dishonest, spineless and un-democratic. If the general public continues to buy the bullshit the Government is peddling, it will be the British public who will pay the price in the next few years. So unless you are all dying with something that will kill you with certainty in the next couple of years, wake up and realise facts. Fact is the NHS as we know it will be no more unless the whole of the British public fights this. Just google how much it’d cost you to pay for your health insurance in the US and imagine the UK going the same. Doctors are in hot demand the world over. We can and will be forced to leave the UK and the NHS is this horror continues and we will be fine. I assure you. So the fact that I am getting emotional is not because I am a greedy lazy overpaid privileged posh kid as Hunt and co would have you believe. It is because I care and I am not afraid to show it. Fact!

What does a Junior Doctor Do Exactly?

A letter written to Jeremy Hunt by a consultant currently working in England.
An excellent illustration of how indispensible ‘junior’ doctors are to the NHS and the public as a whole. I couldn’t have put it better myself so I haven’t tried to 😀

…………………………..

Dear Mr Hunt,

My name is Philip, and I am a consultant physician. Not so long ago, I was a junior doctor and like many others I am outraged and angry about what you propose to do with ‪#‎juniordoctors‬ and their ‪#‎juniorcontracts‬.

I thought that maybe, given you have not worked in healthcare, you might not understand what it is that doctors do (much like if I was made, say, head of Network Rail) so I thought maybe I can help you by shining a light on what I used to a few years ago as a medical registrar.

The medical registrar is the most senior medical doctor in the hospital out of hours. In explaining to my friends what we do, I tell them everyone who doesn’t need an operation right away, or doesn’t have a baby falling out of them, above the age of 16, is our business (and often we have to look after those too). We were the ubiquitous shirehorses that carried the hospitals medical workload day and night. And here’s a typical night shift I did at a general hospital. (all details changed and adapted from real cases to protect patient confidentiality).

I arrive at 8:50 PM for a 9:00 PM handover. It’s been a busy day and the emergency department is full. The outgoing medical registrar tells me there are no beds in the hospital. There are 10 patients waiting in A&E for the medical team, and a lot of patients need reviewing on the wards. He’s already admitted 36 patients during the day, and the consultant is still there seeing some of them with the daytime doctors. I wave hello at her as I head into the fray. I know the consultant and she’s not seen her kids since her on call week started. She waves back wearily.

My first patient for review was a young man with abdominal pain. My first thought as I walked into his cubicle, he looks sick. This is a skill you develop after years of training, when you look at someone and know that they are minutes from death. He’s grey, clammy and shocked. I immediately set about treating his shock and assessing why this has happened. Does he have a bad infection? Is he bleeding? Does he have a blood clot on his lungs? A quick bedside test confirms he’s bleeding badly, likely internally, and my surgical colleague (another junior doctor) and I urgently arrange for an operation. He hurriedly talks to his parents and completes a inacapacitated patient consent form as his condition deteriorates. I leave him in theatres with the anesthetists and surgeons as I have other patients to see.

The next patient was an elderly woman who has fallen. Although she has no hip fracture, she’s unable to walk and needs admission for painkillers and rehabilitation. I reassure her as best I can and stop many of her medicines potentially making her fall. There are no beds for her on the assessment unit or the elderly care ward, so the A&E sister arranges for a pressure support mattress and bed for her in the department overnight. She was lonely and depressed, and I spend some time talking to her about her worries and fears but after a while I needed to move on. She squeezes my hand and smiles, thanks me and settles for the night.

Next is a resus patient with an asthma attack. He is drunk and abusive verbally, though he’s too breathless to be too abusive. A blood test show his attack is life threatening and he he fights off attempts to treat him by myself and the A&E team, pulling off his nebuliser mask and oxygen. As I read out the blood test result to the intensive care registrar (another junior doctor) the man goes blue in the face, gasps and stops breathing. I drop the phone, run over and take over his breathing with a manual ventilator. He has had a respiratory arrest. Alarms blare, help comes running, we inject him with various medicines to help relax his airways and the intensive care doctor slips a tube into his windpipe to help him breathe. The consultant physician, still there, helps with what she could, running blood tests and helping to scribe in the notes. After a nervous period, he stabilises and we take him to intensive care.

It’s now midnight.

In the meantime I have reviewed five more patients, seen by the twilight team, and also my night SHO has discussed some patients with me. The consultant finally got home around 11PM. I’m now on the wards, a liver patient with severe cirrhosis is unrousable. I read through the notes. He has cirrhosis and is not suitable for a transplant. The team has tried everything. I sit and talk with his family, telling them I’m very sorry but there’s nothing more to be done. They cry, one of them screams at me that I’ve killed him, but I accept this as part of my job. With more assurance they’re calmer and I reassure them he’ll be kept comfortable.

My bleep goes off as I write in the notes. Is that the medical reg? The hospital is now totally full, can you please choose some patients to send to our sister hospital down the road? I groan, although I understand the necessity patients understandably hate it. I pick four stable patients and liaise with the registrar down the road.

2AM. I send my SHO off for a quick break as I review some more patients. A confused elderly man who might have a urine infection, a young man with severe headache, a diabetic patient with a very high blood sugar, a lady withdrawing from alcohol and hallucinating. The A&E sister makes me a coffee, lots of milk, lots of sugar.

3AM. I’m with a man in resus again, he is vomiting bright red blood in large volumes. He is jaundiced and looks unwell, very unwell. As the A&E team arranges for a massive transfusion to be set up, I ring the intensive care doctors and the gastroenterology consultant. He listens and says “I’ll be coming in”. I then slip a line into his neck under local anaesthetic, a practiced skill that’s hard at 3AM when you’re tired, but fortunately successful. We pour blood, clotting products, medications and antibiotics into him to halt the bleeding. The gastro consultant arrives at 3:40 and he’s taken to theatres where he performs a life saving procedure. The patient goes to ITU.

4AM. A brief moment to sit down for a quick break. I have reviewed three more of the SHO’s patients. This is the first time we’ve had a chance to sit down together, a quick chat and a cup of tea was interrupted by a cardiac arrest bleep. We run to the cardiac ward. A 54 year old gentleman admitted with chest pain by the day team has had a sudden cardiac arrest. The excellent CCU nurses are doing CPR and attaching a monitor. I ask them to stop as it’s attached, the rhythm is ventricular fibrillation.

“Back on the chest please, charge defib to 150, charging. OK, off the chest, stand clear, top middle bottom myself, oxygen away, SHOCKING.” The patient jolts. “Back on the chest please.” I heard myself say.

Two minutes later he has a pulse. We repeat an ECG, he’s had a full heart attack. I call the cardiologist at the heart attack centre 10 miles away. He’s accepted and an ambulance crew transfers him for an emergency angioplasty. I send my SHO back to A&E as I write a transfer note.

5AM. The resus doors burst open. Another patient, an elderly woman with breathlessness. The A&E F2 listens to the chest, pulmonary oedema. She’s given the emergency treatment but it’s not working. I decide to start her on positive pressure oxygen. Strapped to her face was a tight mask blowing oxygen to inflate her lungs, buying time for the medicines to work. The plan works and pints of dilute urine fills her catheter bag, her breathing improves and she says thank you through the mask. Despite the fatigue I smile and give the F2 a fist bump for a job well done.

7AM. Four more reviews. a patient with kidney failure due to medications, a depressed young man who took an overdose, an elderly nursing home resident with pneumonia, and an elderly man with a broken hip whom I assess with the orthopaedic surgeon. I start to round up the patients for the ward round. 18 patients overnight, five transfers out, one death. A relatively quiet night. I check with the clinical site manager and SHO that we’ve not missed anyone and click save on the list. No one is waiting to be seen, a good feeling.

8AM. The consultant from last night arrives, she looks tired but asks us how we’re doing. OK we said. We start in A&E as most of our patients are still there, the site manager is worried as some of the patients from last night are coming up to 12 hours in A&E. We review each patient’s story and tests, and talk to them about their condition. We visit ITU for the two new transfers there.

11AM. The ward round of the night patients are done, and I have completed a death certificate for a patient overnight. I climb into my car and listen to the breakfast show as I drive home, an hour away. I’ll be in bed by 1PM , and back for the night shift after 6 hours sleep. A relative luxury from a relatively quiet night.

This would be a relatively quiet night for a junior doctor and I am sure many registrars would laugh at how easy I’ve had it! But the people doing this work are junior doctors, who show dedication, commitment and goodwill beyond belief. They do lifesaving work up and down the country, working hard without complaining and sacrificing time with their families.

Please, I beseech you, treat them fairly and with the compassion they treat others daily. The new contract is not fair, and the extended hours it’ll cause is not safe. ‪#‎notfairnotsafe‬

I hope this little story will give you some insight into the vital work junior doctors and the NHS do. If you like, please come and spend a night at our hospital, I’ll come in with you and show you around. Please talk to my junior colleagues and listen to them, you may be surprised what you’ll learn.

Best wishes,

Dr Philip Lee

Should anyone accept blatant injustice and a distinct lack of appreciation?

Question I often get asked: would you push your children down the route to become a doctor?

Answer before graduating medical school: yes if they expressed interest in medicine, I would encourage it.

Answer now: Not unless medicine was the only thing they want to do (like me) but I would encourage them to look at other career pathways and think about the quality of life they might be signing up for. I would tell my child (and indeed any other child that asks) that there are plenty of ways of helping people, not just medicine. I would say that unless they have spoken to many doctors, read blogs/articles written by a wide variety of doctors and done a good period of shadowing of a full time NHS junior doctor, maybe consider something like law or better yet engineering if they want a profession or even become a journalist, photographer or best of all a human rights activist. Other healthcare roles are available and evolving with incentives and support to train in those pathways. A physician’s assistant is better off than the physician, not just in terms if salary but expectations and quality of life. Nurse Practitioners (specialist or advanced) certainly have a better work life balance and earn more for their hours.

Maybe in the 20th century, doctors’ pay and the respect they got compensated for the gruelling backbreaking hours of hard work and sweat and not getting to see daylight for days on end. But not now. Not in the NHS in England

Government threatens the NHS in England
Government threatens the NHS in England

anyway. I dread to think what the state of affairs will be in 2022 when a baby being born today would be making that career decision 😐

P.s my answer in short: no save yourself, do something else

She is Someone

A little girl is born. Hopefully, she is received into the world with love and happiness. Unfortunately, there are still many places where having a baby girl is not a joyous occasion. Where femicide is still a problem – where baby girls are killed soon after being born because the culture sees it as shameful to be a parent to girls and not boys. Where new born baby girls are still dumped in their thousands, left defenseless because they are unwanted by those who bring them into this world. where baby girls are sent to a far flung rural hamlet and not registered in the birth registers. Where girls are sent out at a very young age to hawk small wares and be taken advantage of by paedophiles whilst their brothers are sent to school to be educated.

Sadly, the world is very unequal when it comes to gender. Even in the most ‘advanced’ of societies, women are under-appreciated. It boggles my mind that for the same job, same hours and same skills set, many women in the USA and Europe still get paid less than their male counterparts. Today, professional women who live in a partnership (marriage or otherwise) in the West still do majority of housework and childcare. Many a man will complain about doing what few chores he is asked to do for the woman (and his children) he claims to love. Many a man will feel they are entitled to be selfish and only worry about what is theirs alone whilst their woman cater for them and their children. To many, it doesn’t even occur to them to consider how their woman feels. How hard they make the life of their woman by not contributing a fair amount to making their home as nice as it is. To many, they don’t routinely say please or thank you for all the little things their woman thinks to do for them.

Double standards are still very evident in everyday life today. A man who has serial one night stands is a young man sowing his wild oats. All sorts of excuses about them needing to get it out of their system, yadda yadda yadda. A young woman does the same, she is seen as loose. A teenage girl gets pregnant and everyone judges her and her parents but very few will point the same finger at the teenage boy who made her pregnant. He doesn’t have to stop hanging out with his friends, he gets to carry on going to school whilst she has to drop out of school in shame and lose most of her friends. The baby is seen as her responsibility and she gets judged if she stumbles and becomes overwhelmed by one of the hardest jobs in the world.

A mother I think arguable has the most essential job in the world. The world’s population is obviously dependent on women bearing children. The mother does the lion share of teaching children about life, how to treat each other, and the difference between wrong and right. She teaches them about hygiene and how to dress. She is often the disciplinarian. She gets to play bad cop and yet in most cases, the children know that mother loves them. Mother’s hug is the best. Mother’s kisses cure all hurts. Mum is the one you run too when your heart is broken. Mum’s food is the one you crave when you are ill. And we all know, mother knows best. She wants what is best for us. She always has a welcoming smile, an ear ready to listen and a shoulder to lean on in our moments of doubt. She is our best friend. This is why my mind is boggled by the fact that women are so undervalued in this world. How can any man think less of a person because they are female when they were shaped by the love of a woman?

Now I know some mothers are not the best of mothers. Not all mothers are amazing. Not all of them get it right. However, the vast majority have their hearts in the right place and do the best they can for their children. Most of them, despite their faults, try to be all that I have described above for their children and I think regardless of their failures, we should remember how much of their lives they give up so that they provide for us. So that they are there for us. And our gratitude should translate into respect for our mothers which extend to all the mothers out there.

Religion interpreted by men also discriminates against women. I will talk about my religion Islam because I know what it means to be a Muslim girl and woman. There is a lot of obsessing about how women dress in many Muslim communities. Men conveniently forget the Islam asks men to cast down their gaze when in the company of the opposite sex. So I ask you, if they are busy not staring at women, why do they notice every little thing about how we decide to dress? Also, apparently some Muslim men believe that a woman should ask the permission of her husband to leave the house yet the husband is free to go and do as he pleases without letting his wife know what his plans are. What amazes me even more is that in some Muslim circles, the said husband goes out and pulls another woman to bring home as a second wife and that is all acceptable whereas if a wife wants to go to the market or college/university, the husband is allowed to be mad she went without his permission. Is what way is that fair?

So all I am saying is that I think men need to rethink how they treat the women in their lives. So we are biologically different and in the old days, perhaps physical strength was directly linked to survival but in this day and age, things are different. Physical strength is only an advantage in a few circles. Women have as many skills as men do and are as valuable in modern society as the men. Most importantly, women do the world’s hardest yet most rewarding job for free. They are our mothers. They deserve our respect. If you are an employer, pay everyone fairly for the job they do. If you employ a woman to do the same job as a man, pay her the same. If you are married or cohabiting with a woman you love and she works as many hours as you do, do some cooking and cleaning too and don’t make her ask you a million times first. If you haven’t seen your mother for a while, call her up today and take her out for a nice dinner or if you lucky to have lots of money in the bank, buy her a cruise or send her off on a surprise holiday or spa break. Show her how much you appreciate all the love and time she has invested in you. Call up your sister and tell her you love her. You know it’s the fair thing to do. Just do it!