Tag Archives: ego

Male Drivers

Have you as a girl ever sat next to a male driver and heard them make the comment ‘female drivers!’ with disdain dripping from every word? Have you as a boy been the person making that comment? Well I have news for you, I think in many ways male drivers are just as bad and in some cases much worse drivers. Sure many female drivers tend to err on the side of caution and so you may be excused for getting a little impatient when they drive at a speed of 25 miles/hour in a 30 miles/hour zone and refuse to get into the slow lane. that annoys me too. However, ask anyone who has had an accident whilst crossing the road in a residential area where a boy racer (or just as likely a fat middle-aged balding man) has decided he would rather go at 50 miles/hour and you end up losing a spleen or even a kidney for a momentary lapse of concentration out on the roads. I regularly tell off male drivers for turning normal roads into formula 1 arenas and risking my life just to get to a movie or meal when they have wasted too much time starting out in the first place (you know who you are!). Not worth it is what I say.

One thing that intensely irritates me is when men say women have no spatial awareness. Er, I have no issues bay parking properly thank you very much and my reversing round a corner was the easiest skill for me to master. Ask my driving instructor and the person who conducted my driving test. I think men have spatial awareness issues big time. And they display these issues in the least expected place. They cannot drive within their lane! My husband is chief culprit. He is forever drifting over the line and sometimes well into the next lane without meaning to switch lanes. When I complained, he would say things like I am not holding anyone up or I was avoiding a bump. Rubbish! My father-in-law had to concede my point when on one 30-minute journey alone I pointed out 10 men drivers with their wheels on the lane divider or even over. And majority of those were holding me up too. Men!

Another thing is men in large expensive cars. As a sensible woman, my car is a good-size (I drive a Nissan Leaf and before that I had a little car, the Nissan Micra). I am forever having to pull up short because men see me coming and think they can just pull out in front of me when I have right of way. My husband laughs when I complain and says it’s because they think me in my smaller less expensive car would not want to bash their humongous overpriced toy. Well, I will have you know that this female driver makes it a point not to let such impudence slide and I never let them in if they try to force their way in front of me. I simply let the irate looks wash off my back and sometimes the swearing that comes with that. In fact, I usually grin broadly and give them a cheeky wave to rub it in. What a cheek! I regularly pretend I do not see them pulling out and purposely leave the braking a little late and then pull up just before I make contact whilst I enjoy the look of horror on their faces. Dangerous game I know but it’s so worth it when I get the reaction I seek. Hehehehe.

Biggest safety concern of all is men on their phones. It is as if that law was made for female drivers alone. The number of times I have had a man drive erratically in front of me and I have had to switch lanes to avoid an accident, only to go past them to see that they are busy fiddling with their phone. Van drivers in particular are always on the phone having a chat as they weave in and out of traffic. I always wonder who is supposed to be enforcing that law and where they are. I mean I sort of understand looking at your phone when you have stopped at a traffic light but actually driving at high speed and using the mobile phone is downright dangerous. Most of all I think it is very selfish. If you do not value your life all that  much and a phone call or text about how wasted you got last night is worth you risking your life, then take a second to consider that when you are driving a car, you are only 1 of potentially a whole crowd of people whose lives are at risk. I will give you an example of this. When I was out in Nigeria in 2012, one of my doctor colleagues lost his mother. How? His sister who was driving was using her phone, took her eyes off the road and crashed into another car, instantly killing her own mother and a passenger in the other car and causing serious injury to herself and the other passengers involved. I ask you: is it worth it? I know that if I killed my mother because of my mobile phone, I would probably lose the will to live. Even if it was a stranger that got killed or permanently disabled, it would scar me for life.

Having said all of that, I must commend male drivers for one thing. In general, I have found them to be more generous of spirit when it comes to letting you in when you are coming into slow traffic and they have right of way. I don’t know what it is with female drivers but it’s like a crazy competition not to let another female driver in front of them. Like letting you in is to give up their crown for the throne of I-don’t-know-what. I regularly am kept idling for multiple cars all driven by women and am finally let in by a kind gentleman. So all hail male drivers for their courtesy (and I will purposefully exclude the rude male taxi drivers particularly those in black cabs who are the opposite of gentlemanly). So I leave you on a final note that please when you drive out of your home and go on public roads, remember your highway codes, drive in your allocated lane (if you can’t tell where you should be, please do visit the optician at your earliest convenience), respect your fellow drivers female and male alike and most of all, do not presume to be a better driver because you have a penis. As far as I know, it is not actually capable of driving a car itself.


WoMD – Not in My Name Please!

I will start with a small apology for anyone who is reading this to get away from all the doom and gloom in the media these days. This story is about now. About Boko Haram and the Nigerian Government’s failings that have led to an unstable Northern Nigeria which threatens to destabilise not only the whole of Nigeria but all of West Africa. About poor Malaysia being caught up in Putin’s plot to regain USSR glory days. About the Israeli who are fighting darts with spears. About the US blindly refusing to do what is right in favour of protecting their own skin and financial interests. About the UK which though slow in its condemnation of  some of the atrocities on our (British) doorstep, has finally started to show some balls but are dragging their heels anyway so that by the time they respond, it will be too little too late.

I have signed several petitions to force the UK Government to discuss a response to Israel and Russia. I have added Tesco and Sainsbury’s to the list of boycotted companies/institutions which fuel much of the instability with the profits from my shopping. And fortunately, my husband (from a Christian Zimbabwean background) is supporting me to stand by my principle. My principle is simple. I do not sanction murder. In any shape or form. I hate weapons of mass destruction (WoMD): guns, mines and bombs (atomic or nuclear) and I really wish oil was not so intrinsically linked to murder. I always say if I were to be made King of All, my first task would be to gather all of those weapons created specifically with the intent to kill and burn them all.

Despite my efforts not to get too politically involved and give myself a coronary, I have had this debate several times. First of all, it tends to be traditional men with a misguided sense of masculinity who think weapons of mass destruction are good. Because they can be used in self-defence. Right. My take on that is: if I was angry with my neighbour and in a moment of blind fury rushed over and slapped her, the likely response is for her to slap me too. Maybe harder, maybe multiple times but I am likely to be alive at the end of it all. So she might be high on narcotics and shove me hard, causing me to fall, crack my head open and die instantly. Chances of that are slim though because majority of neighbours are not on narcotics. Now lets imagine I have a gun for self-defense and she does too because we all want to protect ourselves. I might in that moment of blind fury grab my gun and because I am blinded, shoot randomly and get her in the leg. She goes to hospital and when she comes back, she is out for revenge. More importantly, she wants to teach me and other neighbours the lesson that I cant shoot her and get away with it, so she plots and comes over when she knows I will be defenceless and shoots me straight in the heart and I die instantly. Then all my neighbours freak out and rush out to buy guns. The vicious cycle has started with no end in sight except ever-spiralling obsession with protecting oneself.

The argument then turns to ‘but the Armed Forces have to have guns so that the law can be enforced’. I agree. Why not use weapons of control instead of murder? Why not give them all tasers instead to incapacitate criminals and lock them up until they undergo trial for their crimes? Why not resort to using pepper spray and tear gas? If we are so intent on killing everyone we perceive to be criminal, what was the point of the fight to ban death by guillotine/hanging/firing squads/lethal injection etc? Because lets face it, who really thinks a mass murderer, serial killer/torturer or serial rapist is going to be rehabilitated by a stint in jail? Rehabilitated enough that you would be happy to live next to them and allow your children to play out of your sight. I confess I don’t believe people who premeditate murder, torture or rape will ever get to the point where if they had the chance, they wouldn’t murder, torture or rape again. I would never knowingly/willingly live in the same street or even same neighbourhood as an ex-con like the Suffolk Strangler Steve Wright or more recently Ian Huntley who could be up for parole in about 15 years.

To those farmers/land owners who want to protect their animals/land and so have to own a gun, it is the same argument for me. Why not use a tranquiliser gun that is used on Safari to guard against wild animals turning, well, wild? And come to think of it, use the same tranquilisers on those who try to rustle your cows. My point is if nobody had guns, then nobody would need a gun to defend their person or property. I know this is a pipe dream though because lets face it, who is going to make me king? I am a girl. I have no royal lineage (well nothing that would make me big enough to ban WoMD) and I am anti-establishment most of the time. Better not!

I could write a whole book on why WoMD are evil but I think you get the gist. I hate them. And most normal people would agree. So why are we all so quiet in the face of irresponsible gun-loving idiots we have allowed to govern us leading us into war? I mean, the UK for the first time saw through the faked dossiers on WoMD in Iraq/Tony Blair/Bush conspiracy to invade the Middle East and get at the oil. The numbers at the anti-war demonstration were unprecedented and this was before the war began. I marched in London with my mom. I was 17 at the time and I could foresee the carnage we see today in the Middle east and the instability throughout the West as a result of their involvement. How could Tony Blair and Bush  with all their ‘intel’ not foresee it? How was it legal for the UK to go to war despite the fact that more people demonstrated against it than voted for the government. And what makes me laugh (because if I don’t laugh, I will cry for the shame of being British) is that Tony Blair now has the audacity to pose as the UN Peace Envoy for the Middle East. No wonder the ceasefire farce fell through! What a hypocrite!

These politicians, they all are hypocrites. They are not there to serve the people or improve what is already there. They are all blinded by their power and the need to serve their gigantic egos and leave a legacy in the world. And we sanction it by our inaction. By buying good from companies we know are sending a proportion of all their profits to places like Russia, Ukraine, Palestine, Nigeria, Israel etc. Those places that are already unstable and whose downfall might  benefit some rich or powerful little man in the West (and increasingly in the East). We sanction them by voting for them (I know we have no real choice anyway in the UK). We sanction them by paying our taxes and then silently watching our money being spent on murder of helpless civilians whilst our needs (NHS, utilities, education) are being neglected. What a farce! May we all wake up to the harsh realities and wield the enormous power we have. What we have is the power in numbers. A weapon of taking back control (WoTBC)*. I know which I prefer between WoMD and WoTBC!


*This is not a real phrase. It is my creation and no government has sanctioned its use. It in no way represents the views of the UK or Nigerian leadership.